We all have a longing for peace and rest. Unfortunately, most of us maintain a life in constant anxiety. We don’t take time to stop and enjoy our surroundings, and it takes a toll on our bodies, attitudes, and relationships. Dennis and Barbara Rainey, authors of“Pressure Proof Your Marriage”, share the dangers of stress in a marriage and family: “[We] are convinced that pressure is the silent killer of most marriages in this country. … A couple can have great communication, enjoy dynamic sex, and make plenty of money, but that’s not enough. Their marriage is still vulnerable to the relentless, constant force of pressure that threatens to destroy even the best of relationships” (pp 19-20). Here are some ideas to help reduce stress in our lives in healthy ways:
Seek peace with others. Unresolved conflict can weigh on our hearts and cause a lot of pain and anxiety. Make a list of those with whom you have conflict, and then seek one-by-one to make restitution. Pray for a heart of forgiveness for those who have offended you and for a heart of grace for those whom you have offended.
Learn to say no. Make a commitment this year to STOP doing so many things. Set boundaries around requests for your time. Learn to say “yes” and “no” with purpose. By refusing to say yes to everything, you free yourself up to say yes to other, better choices for you and your family. If your “to-do” lists are making life harder instead of easier, maybe it’s time to consider making a “stop-doing” list. By doing so, you’ll break the busyness in your life before the busyness breaks you.
Write lists and take notes. Writing things down not only helps you remember important details, but also prevents you from worrying about forgetting things. Worry itself often produces unbearable stress. If you can live a more carefree life, you’re less likely to suffer mentally, emotionally and physically. Your spiritual life will benefit as well.
Plan ahead. Stress is often due to lack of planning. As the old saying goes, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”If you know you’re going to have a hectic week, do some things to prepare and solicit help.
Take things one step at a time. Facing a mountain of projects can be overwhelming, even paralyzing. Instead of thinking about the insurmountable amount of work, just concentrate on the first step. Remember that you are not alone, and it’s okay to seek support.